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My dad in Vietnam |
On September 1, 2007 my father passed away from
ischemic heart disease, which is a fancy way of saying his arteries were so blocked that blood couldn't travel back to his heart. It's been six years since his death, but the wound was ripped open last year when my mom and I found out his death was tied to his military service in Vietnam.
It's not fair, I lamented,
It's just not fair.
Agent Orange, which was an herbicide used by the U.S. military in Vietnam, has been linked to the deaths of many veterans. The
official list of health complications includes 14 different diseases, but ischemic heart disease didn't make the list until three years ago.
The heart wrenching part of all of this is that several individuals have told my mother that the doctors knew Agent Orange was the cause -- they were simply told by the government to keep it under wraps. Awful. I'm not all about debating government conspiracy theories, but that was completely unjust for the hundreds, if not thousands, of families affected by this.
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My dad and I with Bonnie, the Butterscotch Beagle |
My emotional response to all of this seems to be cycling from anger to disgust to sadness, then back to anger again. You never think these things will happen to you, and then all of a sudden you're seemingly drowning in life's "lemons."
Where is Comfort in the midst of all this? He's here. Sometimes I try to ignore Him. Sometimes I yell at Him. Sometimes I blame Him. But He remains right here with me through it all.
"The mountains may disappear, and the hills may come to an end, but my love will never disappear; my promise of peace will not come to an end," says the Lord who shows mercy to you."
[Isaiah 54:10]