uncertainties.

I've been on campus for 5 days.

I was already completely exhausted by the first day of classes.

Since returning to campus, my nights have consisted of very little sleep. Not that I don't TRY to sleep. I just can't. If I could pick one word to describe my feelings the past few days, it would be restless.

My RA application is due in 9 days, but I have yet to start it. Every time that I sit down to work on the essays, I am completely overcome by fear. I absolutely hate the unknown. It scares the bajeebies out of me! I think this has been the cause of my inability to sleep.

Now that I have been a Negative Nancy, let me tell you something: God is faithful.

Yesterday I hit a low point. By the time 10pm rolled around, I was completely drained--I had nothing left to offer. After our little Welcome Back Bash for Westside, I went to my room. Once I shut my door, I began to cry. I needed rest.

Still crying, I fell into my bed, and the only prayer that I could muster up was:

"God, I need you. I'm exhausted."

Though I didn't have enough energy to form anything close to an eloquent prayer, God still heard me. I slept like a rock! God is good :)

Today's happy thoughts:

- I'm alive.

- I got 7 solid hours of sleep last night.

- McConn had my favorite fresh brew: Black Label.

"In the new year, I will live one day at a time. I will make each day one of preparation for better things ahead. I will not dwell on the past or the future, only on the present. I will bury every fear of the future, all thoughts of unkindness and bitterness, all my dislikes, my resentments, my sense of failure, my disappointments in others and in myself, my gloom and my despondency. I will leave all these things buried and go forward..."

[Taken from: Twenty-four Hours a Day]